TV Shows

Moon Knight (ongoing)

Episode Six

Wow, I was right on the money. Creator and lead writer Jeremy Slater doesn’t have the heart or courage to tell a complete story. What a total cop-out of an ending. CGI fest of shitty fight sequences, a near rip off of Wonder Woman 1984’s costume, and the classic trope of “I literally just killed 20+ people but no, I won’t kill the lead bad guy. That’s evil!” Message received Jeremy. Egyptian people’s lives are worthless compared to an older white dude. Oh, but wait random internet critic, there’s a scene after the credits rectifying that! See, I am creative!

We have our first Egyptian superhero! So badass that she can stop bullets, and that her enemies are so braindead that they shoot their AKs point-blank at her wings instead of you know, her legs. See? Jake did make an appearance but only after I once again, director included, chickened out from actually showing his fight scene. Everyone loves getting blue-balled, especially twice.

The real winner here is Ethan Hawke. Man had to do the bare minimum, just walk around and say some lines, and bam, made millions. Oscar Isaac and May Calamawy at least had to actually put some effort into acting to get their paychecks.

You’d think after the abysmal writing that was Fantastic Four, and Umbrella Academy, and Death Note, that people would stop throwing money at hacks but clearly somebody at Marvel enjoys having subpar quality when it comes to their TV shows. No agenda at play here, nope. Russian superhero in Black Widow? Yea, let’s tarnish that so Russian kids don’t have anyone to look up to. But Egyptian superhero? Yea, we’ll make her badass, brave and able to take care of her own shit. Please ignore that we tried to copy WW1984.

Episode Five

Oh hey, I was right. Grade 4 storytelling continues. Oscar Isaac keeps giving one of his best performances. Ethan Hawke is underutilized. Clear example of “we paying for your name on our posters”.

Yea, the ending was satisfying. I have stated several times, I do not like the rendition that they went with for the character of Steven Grant. It feels like they either were too cowardly to make comic book Steven, or too scared of it being too similar to Batman and other rich heroes. Either way, this version of Steven is horrendous.

The episode only showed the creation of Steven, and with how much there is left to resolve, it appears that this show will follow the standard of Marvel. That is, to make a CGI fest for an ending because they didn’t have the heart or courage to tell a complete story. And so the final episode will most likely be a rushed hodge-podge. Wandavision also suffered the same fate. 4-5 episodes of somewhat unique and above average storytelling that unraveled in the final episode because… Who knows?

Episode Four

My favorite moment was at 11:56 because their rendition of Steven Grant is still terrible. Most enjoyable scene so far, followed closely by the next bit as he falls down into the hole. The horror reminded me of my grade 4-6 short stories where I read up on ancient Egyptians, and thought how best to gross out my classmates. Mummification, and taking out the organs into urns worked best. They were always grossed out.

Oscar Isaac is doing his best, and so is May Calamawy as Egyptian Tomb Raider. Even got neglected by a father who is a renowned archeologist that happened to disappear/get murdered under mysterious circumstances. She’s badass, and can take care of herself. Never fear when mummies get her, she’ll Brendan Fraser them on her own.

And that ending is a nice bit to the whole being judged by your memories for the afterlife. Except there’s multiple versions of you because of DID. I expect he’ll reach that hall of the Gods again and do what needs to be done. Only two episodes left to find out.

Episode Three

Yup, the more I watch, the more episode one feels like a huge waste of time and character development. Should have cut all the Steven Grant stuff out, that character is a terrible adaptation from the comics. I actually would have preferred the insane millionaire over broke whiny Steven that disjoints the action. Anyways, this third episode featured the late Gaspard Ulliel who was unfortunately under-utilized here.

There was a very cool scene towards with the manipulation of the night sky but such an event would have global consequences, and would surely reach the eyes and ears of every other superhero. I fully expect them to show up next episode otherwise we gotta confirm that the writer, is once again, an idiot that doesn’t think about such things. Painfully going in on that Tropic Thunder quote.

Fight scenes were plain laughable after watching Russian Raid. This is tier B movie fighting, not a Marvel production.

Episode Two

Pretty much disliked it until the last 13 minutes when Steven finally got rid of, and the character that I actually care about, Marc Spector, finally came to play. I learned online that the one scene that I absolutely hated in the first episode was actually the fault of the director. Goes to show that the executives do know their stuff. If that scene was cut, the whole mood would change. I wouldn’t see him as an inept mongoloid but rather a man facing a crisis of the mind. Where’s Kevin Feige when you need him.

What was up with that Mandarin spoken by Ethan Hawke? Was the point that he only pretends to care about learning languages because that was some next level butchering… well according to online forums, that is. When the suit came out, a small sliver of what could be shone bright. Maybe the last two episodes will be good.

Episode One

To quote a favorite comedy, Tropic Thunder, “Everyone knows you never go full retard.” Clearly Oscar Isaac, lead role of the show, and Jeremy Slater, writer and creator, never got that message. Seeing Oscar Isaac stumbling about, mumbling his words gives the opposite effect than they intended: his performance infuriates rather than giving the air of a man troubled in his mind by supposed delusions, and hallucinations. His accent is downright atrocious and laughable – stop saying random British sayings, yes, please say ‘innit’ some more. It’s not his fault though, he can only work with what he’s given. Too bad all Jeremy Slater can ever give is shiny golden turds (Fantastic Four, Death Note, The Umbrella Academy). Newsflash, if I was waking up from blackouts, the FIRST thing I’d do is check my phone for the time and date. The fact the character didn’t do that once until after a blunder on his part, was insulting to the audience.

40 minutes of my life wasted on useless filler. Only the opening two minutes establishing the villain and the final two minutes establishing our actual hero were worthwhile. Everything else was an exercise in terrible writing, piss-poor decisions and a character creating every single problem that befalls him. Moon Knight would be better portrayed in a movie.

Maybe the next five episodes can improve, but it seems to be following the Marvel TV formula of incredibly mediocre writing masked by shiny production values and effects. Time will tell.

1 thought on “Moon Knight (ongoing)”

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